I arrived at the hospital just a little before lunch today and mom looked beaten down. She had a rough morning, emotionally and you could tell that it had taken its toll on her. It would be great if we all had the capability to implement the “blocking” feature found in Outlook into our every day lives. That way we could use it selectively to filter the negativity and junk and be left with things that are positive and uplifting – how cool would that be! But until Bill Gates figures that one out, I should be thankful that I can at least use it on email. :o)
Mom had spent most of the morning, upright in a chair, and when I got there she was about do for a nap. She didn’t sleep too well the night before because the doctor had stopped by for a visit at 1:00am – how do they expect anyone to rest and get well if they make their rounds at such an ungodly hour?
She’ll be going for another CT scan in a few days. That’s the only way that they can tell if the antibiotics have been working on the infection. But her doctor said that she will most likely be in the hospital until Wednesday. We are going to start to interview some home health care agencies in the next few days. It’s important to have those in place before she gets home. They will have a nurse come by and check on her so she can relax in the confines of her own home. They will serve as another set of eyes until she is recovered.
Thankfully, it was a quiet afternoon. The highlight of mom’s morning was a visit from Deacon Ray. He is the most kind and gentle spirit that one would ever hope to meet and mom has known him for a long time, mostly through her church affiliation. She was so thrilled to tell me that he had stopped by to visit and her eyes lit up when she told me he had greeted her with a kiss on her melon. Thank you Deacon Ray for making her day!
Speaking of hair, you should see those follicles. As mom and I were standing in the bathroom, she said a lot of people were telling her that the back was growing in nicely, but she was disappointed that she couldn’t see what they were talking about. Once again, cell phone to the rescue. I took a snap shot of the back of her head and showed it to her. In true mom fashion she said, “Oooh that does look nice. I may not color it when it grows back.”
I am happy to report that her new nursing staff is WONDERFUL. They are all so sweet and attentive. As I left today, one of them pulled me aside and I thought she was going to yell at me because we were having way too much fun last night. But she said the nicest thing. She said that it was wonderful to see her children take such an active part in her care and that she brags about us once we leave – yep…that’s my mom! It’s odd to hear someone say that because frankly I don’t think we really think about it – we just do it. But if you pass by some of the other rooms, her comment makes perfect sense. Sometimes I feel sorrow for those older patients that have no one that comes to visit them. They rely solely on the staff to take care of them physically and in some cases emotionally.
We have gotten so many wonderfully messages of encouragement and thanks through this blog. It’s amazing how many people read it, some in the same situation as us and some that just find our adventure interesting and at times a bit humorous. Since mom is not into all things Internet, we made her a hard copy book of all the entries and messages (both public and private) that we receive through this site. They are all in a binder that she’s been reading for several months and reflects on at her leisure. She has even gotten to the point where she puts the book on loan and gives it to her friends to read – it’s like she is the public library!
Since this blog has been a journey about Cancer from diagnosis to remission, some have asked what will happen to it once mom is well again. I have already made arrangements to have the entries and photos made into a book for mom and the “wingman”. While we have no desire to repeat this process, it will become a cherished possession and testament to mom’s strength and resolve…and if I happen to find myself in a difficult situation, it will serve as my “Playbook” that they can be overcome.
Tomorrow is a new day, sleep well tonight!
Val
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Mom Comm
Good Morning, All….
I thought I would post a blog update before I went to see momisan this morning. She is still in the hospital, but I am thankful that we have at least turned the page to a better chapter in the past few days.
She continues to recover from that CTI Aspiration and the doctor dropped by yesterday and said some of the infection has been identified as “staph.” So they have changed her antibiotics to treat it more aggressively and the infectious disease doctor will be following up with us on Monday.
Mom is doing the best she can with the current circumstances. I imagine she would feel much better if she wasn’t tethered to an IV pole or kicking the catheter bag out of the way, but we remind her that each day she is making a little more progress and pretty soon we will be able to “cut those chains that bind her” and take her home.
She is eating and drinking and for the past two days they take her out for a run around the floor to stretch the old legs and we move her to a chair throughout the day so she doesn’t feel so bed ridden…it’s all good!
We have returned to a semi normal lifestyle, but that is by Cancer standards of course. We don’t stay at the hospital all day; we work in shifts and via cell phone. It’s the funniest thing ever because Andy and I will call each other with daily updates just like the nurses do when they give report. We have dubbed our cell phone adventures as MOM COMM – and mom finds it rather amusing that she has her own mobile command unit.
I can’t imagine what we would do without cell phones!
I once blogged about the duality of Cancer, the fact that even during such a trying and difficult time, you find the most amazing blessings. Mom and I were talking about family yesterday and how the relationships and personalities within that dynamic have changed over the past seven months. My brother Andy has always been close to mom, and that’s because he and mom had a very special bond when he was younger. My dad was away at sea, so by the standards of that time, he became the man of the house and they took care of each other and that bond is still very much intact today.
I, on the other, was the last of the chillin’, and while not always perfect as I child (who really is) my bond with mom developed later in life, around twenty. Mom likes to tell people that she didn’t think I had it in me to take care of her, not because I was unwilling or incapable, but because I am the most squeamish person on the face of the planet. I will be the first person to tell you that I don’t deal well with pain, suffering, needles or anything really hospital related, but then again…I never really had to. I have never been in a position where one of my parents had been so ill that they could not do for themselves. So, if you really think about it, you never really know what someone has in them until they are called to the plate and have the courage to at least pick up that bat, whether they swing and miss or knock one out of the park is irrelevant; you just have to get off the bench.
Over the past few days, I have made a lot of observations about the changing dynamic. I see the way that my husband has put his arm around my brother and told him that he was here for him. I have seen the two of them take my nieces fishing for an hour, just to keep a certain order and balance in our lives during this difficult time, only to have my brother call me and say “You should have seen James with the girls, He’s going to make a good father.” – these are the things that give me peace and remind me that there are blessings to be found in adversity and illness.
Last night, we inadvertently converged at the hospital at the same time – Andy with his family and me with mine…we try not to do that because it turns into a cataclysmic force of nature and it’s a miracle we don’t get thrown out for laughing too loud. But as we tucked momisan into bed, with Andy singing show tunes behind a giant curtain, I couldn’t help but notice the smile on mom’s face. The woman is all about family and she finds great joy in knowing that we “get it”. All those years she has been telling us to be kind, be loving and family is always first has come back to her in an immeasurable amount. And that fact that she can witness how we have implemented those teachings into our own families is why I think she was smiling.
Thank you all for your continued words of encouragement, prayers, visits and well wishes – we are making progress each and every day!
Val
(Don’t worry; she didn’t snatch a baby from the nursery!
Before we left last night, Kristen (Andy’s youngest daughter) wanted to leave her baby, Annabelle with Nan so they could have a sleep over and Nan would not be lonely.)
I thought I would post a blog update before I went to see momisan this morning. She is still in the hospital, but I am thankful that we have at least turned the page to a better chapter in the past few days.
She continues to recover from that CTI Aspiration and the doctor dropped by yesterday and said some of the infection has been identified as “staph.” So they have changed her antibiotics to treat it more aggressively and the infectious disease doctor will be following up with us on Monday.
Mom is doing the best she can with the current circumstances. I imagine she would feel much better if she wasn’t tethered to an IV pole or kicking the catheter bag out of the way, but we remind her that each day she is making a little more progress and pretty soon we will be able to “cut those chains that bind her” and take her home.
She is eating and drinking and for the past two days they take her out for a run around the floor to stretch the old legs and we move her to a chair throughout the day so she doesn’t feel so bed ridden…it’s all good!
We have returned to a semi normal lifestyle, but that is by Cancer standards of course. We don’t stay at the hospital all day; we work in shifts and via cell phone. It’s the funniest thing ever because Andy and I will call each other with daily updates just like the nurses do when they give report. We have dubbed our cell phone adventures as MOM COMM – and mom finds it rather amusing that she has her own mobile command unit.
I can’t imagine what we would do without cell phones!
I once blogged about the duality of Cancer, the fact that even during such a trying and difficult time, you find the most amazing blessings. Mom and I were talking about family yesterday and how the relationships and personalities within that dynamic have changed over the past seven months. My brother Andy has always been close to mom, and that’s because he and mom had a very special bond when he was younger. My dad was away at sea, so by the standards of that time, he became the man of the house and they took care of each other and that bond is still very much intact today.
I, on the other, was the last of the chillin’, and while not always perfect as I child (who really is) my bond with mom developed later in life, around twenty. Mom likes to tell people that she didn’t think I had it in me to take care of her, not because I was unwilling or incapable, but because I am the most squeamish person on the face of the planet. I will be the first person to tell you that I don’t deal well with pain, suffering, needles or anything really hospital related, but then again…I never really had to. I have never been in a position where one of my parents had been so ill that they could not do for themselves. So, if you really think about it, you never really know what someone has in them until they are called to the plate and have the courage to at least pick up that bat, whether they swing and miss or knock one out of the park is irrelevant; you just have to get off the bench.
Over the past few days, I have made a lot of observations about the changing dynamic. I see the way that my husband has put his arm around my brother and told him that he was here for him. I have seen the two of them take my nieces fishing for an hour, just to keep a certain order and balance in our lives during this difficult time, only to have my brother call me and say “You should have seen James with the girls, He’s going to make a good father.” – these are the things that give me peace and remind me that there are blessings to be found in adversity and illness.
Last night, we inadvertently converged at the hospital at the same time – Andy with his family and me with mine…we try not to do that because it turns into a cataclysmic force of nature and it’s a miracle we don’t get thrown out for laughing too loud. But as we tucked momisan into bed, with Andy singing show tunes behind a giant curtain, I couldn’t help but notice the smile on mom’s face. The woman is all about family and she finds great joy in knowing that we “get it”. All those years she has been telling us to be kind, be loving and family is always first has come back to her in an immeasurable amount. And that fact that she can witness how we have implemented those teachings into our own families is why I think she was smiling.
Thank you all for your continued words of encouragement, prayers, visits and well wishes – we are making progress each and every day!
Val
(Don’t worry; she didn’t snatch a baby from the nursery!
Before we left last night, Kristen (Andy’s youngest daughter) wanted to leave her baby, Annabelle with Nan so they could have a sleep over and Nan would not be lonely.)
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